Yes, let’s face it, most of us guys suck when it comes to approaching women. What… You thought it was just you? No dude, we all tend to suck at it. In fact, aside from a few guys who seem to be born with a talent to charm women, most guys suck at this stuff. The good news however is that there is a way to get good approaching women. There is a way to model what those “naturals” do, and develop that talent for yourself. I’ve studied the subject for many years and can share many tricks, tips and secrets with you, but today I’ll just stick with seven tips that are really cool.

1)      Get some cool friends. If your guys are the type who are skeptical about approaching, afraid to do it… or even worse, only approach in a drunk and annoying manner, ditch them. You can find guys who are really cool, social and presentable to women.

2)      Make sure you love yourself. No, I do not mean it in the new-agey way (even though that also helps!) I mean that you are decently satisfied with how you look. You don’t have to go all metrosexual, but just get a decent look that you’re reasonably satisfied with.

3)      Use crutches until you get the courage. The catch 22 here is that in order to have the courage to approach women, you need to have a bunch of experience in having approached women well. In order to have a bunch of experience, you need to have had the courage! This is where crutches come in. One really fun one that I used last night just for fun is the “my friend is scared” approach. This is where you see a girl who’s your friend’s type, and you walk up to her. You go “Hey, my friend wants to meet you, but he’s scared from you, he thinks you don’t look friendly”… To this the girl will usually laugh and defend herself “No, no, I AM FRIENDLY!”. The reason this crutch works is because you are not approaching in your own name, you do not care. You’re only doing it for a friend, and you’ll eject the moment you introduce them two. If you do this crutch enough times, you’ll get so used to approaching hot women, and having them respond well, that eventually you’ll find you can do this in your OWN name

4)      If you do have the courage, stop using crutches! I see a whole bunch of grown men in communities online using openers, pick up lines, routines and other tricks. I used to be one of them. The truth is that once you have the courage to approach, those are not only unnecessary but less than optimal!

5)      Oddly enough, the most optimal approach is just walking up and introducing yourself. I know it doesn’t sounds sexy, I know it doesn’t sound like it should work, but it does! When you have developed the courage and charm to walk up to any girl and make her smile, even this most normal, everyday stuff does miracles. Just walk up, introduce yourself to the girl (or the group). Chat a bit, ask them about them, maybe introduce them to your friends, keep it casual.

6)      Keep it social. The thing guys get wrong too often is getting too sexual, too soon. Don’t stare into her boobs, don’t try to make out (yet!)… Just be social as if though you’re talking to an acquaintance. The trick is being social, cool and fun. I know its ironic, but this is what makes women think of sex! When a guy can just be cool and not hit on them! They’re actually sick and tired of being hit on, and it has the opposite effect! So be social, cool, fun and a challenge. Walk up to them, talk for a few minutes, leave, go talk to another group, return back, be social and charming again. What will tend to happen is she will start hitting on YOU. She’ll either start showing signals or signs. She’ll maybe touch you, hint at something more or start flirting. In essence, you’re letting her think she seduced you!

7)      Escalate the interaction! Now, this is a tricky one… Too many guys will talk to a girl, charm her, be friendly, and then all of a sudden go into wolf mode “GOTTA GET HER NUMBER!!!”. At this point they chase her away… On the other hand, you don’t wanna be too much in the “natural” level, where you wait for things to happen on their own. The solution is subtly and naturally nudge things towards something more. If she mentions for example something you have in common, like a famous concert next week, you can subtly invite her to tag along with you and your friends. If she mentions some author you’ve read too, you can give her your facebook, so you can share some really cool reviews on his next book. Keep it subtle and as if “its meant to be”.

But really dude there's no reason you should be confused about any of this. If you haven't taken the quiz to see how you stack up with women yet... Click here and see what your results are on the personal dating quiz.